What a year ’twas 2011. Amazingj highs… painful lows. And now 2012? Only the good Lord knows.
I have been blessed over the past many months to have been allowed to grow stronger as a person. Strength has come from realizing how deep some of my capacities really are, especially when it comes to love. The complex state of being known as love can bring amazing experiences as well as painful existences. Which is where I find myself today… on the back-end of love. And since this is an impromptu post via QuickPress, I am unsure of where to go from here as relates to what I’m saying. My most important thoughts right now are strength, hope, faith, growth, compassion, emptiness (as in the hard to grasp Buddhist concept of emptiness), perseverance and self-preservation, and of course *love*. And what a love it was (passionate too!), and no doubt still is – minus the act of passion. Even though I cannot be with the one that I love anymore, I shall treasure the time that we were together and honor the growth that I have been allowed as a result of being with such an amazing individual.
As a Christian-Buddhist, I know that though all things are transient, they always remain the same. 1 Cor 13 (NKJV) declares a treatise of love, and I would never have imagined that I would be able to experience so many of those qualities that I most certainly have. The mere fact that one relationship has shown me such excellence is miraculous in itself. Though the relationship has come to an end, I have hope and faith that when the time is right I might be able to give (and receive) the same powerful (if not stronger) love that I have experienced over much of 2011.
With my current desire for healthy mindsets, I feel not grief but yet joy that my life was allowed to become enriched as a result of having been in that relationship. Of course there is sadness and longing, but the Samsaric process of attachment would only further (and deepen) suffering. That I must remember. As well as such, I must consider the seeming-phenomenon that I was able to enrich the life of another… was able to brighten another’s life, eyes, spirit, mind , heart and soul. Those truths I should keep in my heart because of my inferior quality of keeping a low self-esteem and always being quick to downgrade my actions/abilities/accomplishments. However, I do not wish for my soul seeds to be in vain. I feel deep concern for the one that I was with and the path that she will take after we go our ways. I will never allow the ways that her soul moved mine to be lost on me, no. My wish is for her to feel the same and to grow stronger after our separation of being. Though it was a very (verry) complicated relationship, my wish is for the continual seek of bright happiness (for both of us)… even if it must be experienced as separated halves of one whole.
Wow. What a healing that turned out to be. I never imagined for this post to morph into was it essentially has.
Writing is so very healing – a healing that is priceless – a healing that should be encouraged and exercised. But gosh do I still love her… and that is one promise that could never change.
“The camera captures light, our minds capture images.” Anonymous
I really like shadows. Shadows can transform an object into something all together different from its’ definiteness. Shadows can lend depth to a structure or mystery to a scene. It is possible for shadows to incite fear into our psyche due to the familiar morphing into the unfamiliar… but shadows are also capable of turning boring and dull objects or locations into enhanced, more beautiful versions of themselves. The eye is a window to the mind… and shadows are manipulators that expand on our views of the world around us.
I’ve become horrible at keeping this blog up-to-date. I sincerely appreciate the good-hearted folks who have read my writings and viewed my artwork… and even if I’ve not replied to some comments doesn’t mean that they were ignored, no, because I take every word to heart. I hope to one day soon go back and properly acknowledge the time that has been generously spent by the readers and commenters(word?) of my work. Oftentimes, my writings are emotionally charged, and depending my level of personal investment, it can sometimes be difficult to go back and reface some topics.
Photography and art are my releases from the stresses of this world, so please forgive me if I don’t communicate so much in the written format. It’d be nice if there were a tool that would allow thoughts to automagically manifest into typeface, but alas there is not (yet). Putting thoughts into words can be tough at times, especially when there are too many to single out.
I’ve been lucky to find a great group of people to communicate with… and though it might not seem like it at times, I do think about all of you. Thanks for being there.
I feel as if I’m not being very productive as of late… which is too bad. But I have been busy surfing the web and finding lots of great new tools! Twitter has become somewhat of a thing for me, and I’m not sure what a cost-benefit-analysis would reveal regarding my time spent there vs the “stuff” I glean from it. Knowledge is power, so for now I’ll just be content with absorbing new information.
Just so you don’t feel cheated by reading this post, I’ll share some links with you:
http://www.newsmap.jp aggregates news stories and displays the headlines in boxes. The size of the box represents the story’s popularity, and the different shade of the color represents the story’s “freshness” as it were. Stories are color-coded depending on genre, and there are tabs that will filter which stories you want to have represented on the page. You can also filter your news by region and country. Check it out.
http://www.qwiki.com/ is totally not what you might think. Qwiki is a new type of search engine that reads out loud to you. Think back to 1984 and imagine what you thought the future would be like, and Qwiki comes close to that vision. Scarily, it is even reminiscent of George Orwell’s Nineteen Eighty-Four and the idea of the information being feed to you while using Qwiki’s site. I do recommend this new website, but the information isn’t as in-depth as could be gained by manual searching. Qwiki does hold true to it’s moniker in that it is a quick dose of info, with pics to boot. Here is my Tweet about the site: @Qwiki Your site reminds me of Neo in The Matrix in how he would “learn” everything by plugging into a computer. Great concept and interface.
Regarding the title to this post, I take it from The Beatles and their song Eight Days a Week. It seems like my Post-A-Week has become a Post-A-Eight-Days… hehehe. Oh well.
Artists lead a tortured life. Most of the torture is self-inflicted but it is torture nonetheless. Not that I care or anyone else does either, but I am late with my at-least-one-post-per-week quota. Fark. I was going to end this post right here, but instead I have decided to insert a poem I wrote about month or so ago. I wanted to forgo the opening line and its slightly crude aspect, but then the emotion would have become diluted.
gray skies forever so forever skies gray
Ever since joining Red Bubble, my heightened awareness for all things Australian has become deliciously inquisitive. Often I am pulled into a refreshingly vibrant wilderness or an example of a seeming otherworldly urban landscape, leaving me enthralled yet glum to the stark reality of a “mere viewer, removed”. How curious it all seems to me though, and to quote a book title from Dr. Seuss: Oh, the Places (I’d) Go! I might be in a romantic state of bliss, but Australia is admirable and it has turned into a good romance for sure.
Today there was a link in my Twitter feed, which led to a page titled Minimal Melbourne on the Behance Network. There are lots of great pictures around, and here I found a handful more. What I like about this particular series of shots is the focus on new-age architecture. There is a great mix of authentic history so obviously embraced. Many of the flavors of architecture I’ve seen from Oz feels unparalleled here in the States.
I am not widely traveled but much of what I see in America is bland and utilitarian. While there are examples of artsy-architecture (I know no terms), much of it is pointedly concentrated yet sparse in dispersement. Does anyone have a Read more…
Yesterday’s blogging topic from The Daily Post was “Share something that makes you smile”. I didn’t sign up for the Post-A-Day-2011 Blog Challenge “Writing Event Extravaganza Unlimited“, no. I signed up for the Post-A-Week because my non-linear mind will undoubtedly interfere with consistent daily posts… but no less than one per week is ok. I wasn’t even going to bite on the ‘Smile’ topic, but after reading another blogger’s post I decided that I would.
ART is what makes me smile. There is nothing better than something painted, something drawn… a photograph shot, a digital work created… a paragraph engineered, a line in a poem. There have been countless times where I have found myself smiling, and the funny thing is I have no control over it. When a work of art speaks to me, deeply, all bets are off. There have been times I have felt so taken aback when a grin stretched across my face and morphed into a full-blown beam. There have even been some Eureka! moments elicited as my mind would enter an osmosis-state… neurotransmitters from the Artist’s work syncing up with the neuro-transceivers in my physiological brain. The real fun comes when the antimatter morphs into matter and takes my digital mind on a roller-coaster ride. Digital isn’t just for computers you know. Humans can operate in this way as well… just think about it.
I no doubt throw terms around loosely, and even make up a few, but the case is this: We are in control of our own minds. The physical brain is mass and matter… lots of chemicals even. But the mind is digital… the mind is infinite. If ever there is something that captivates me, I let it, and then I explore where it might take my mind. Profound things have happened to me as a result of viewing some piece of artwork or reading some poem or prose. Friendships have even blossomed due to art. Communication plays a big role here, but it doesn’t have to, because art can touch sans words. What it all boils down to is a vibration… an excited current of ones and zeros pulsating through the digital channels of our minds… and often Art is the exciter.
minor edits to semantics and grammar on 5 Jan 2011 @ 18:14 EST